Laurie's story: "Their father will be employed again"

Last November, Laurie Reid's husband came home from work without a job for the next day.

How do they shield their children from the stress of losing their household's only income?

The Reids, parents of two, have lived a comfortable but not extravagant life in Charlotte for 20 years. Now, with thoughtful candor, Laurie faces the strain and challenges her family is confronting.

We've been bringing you Laurie's story weekly - along with others from around Charlotte. They are voices that speak to the different challenges that you'll find throughout our city. We want to hear your stories of struggles and successes, too.

Writes Laurie:

We have settled into a new norm at our house since my husband was laid off. When the alarm goes off at 6:00 a.m., he heads for the shower, the kids wake up and ready themselves for school and I pack lunches and shout orders. When all of our chores are done, we assemble into the kitchen for a quick breakfast before my husband whisks the kids off to the bus, just as he has done every day for the past 7 years.

The difference is that now instead of going to work directly from the bus stop, he comes home. And instead of wearing a pair of pressed khakis and a starched button down shirt, he sports a pair of worn jeans and a long sleeve t-shirt. We've settled into this new routine rather nicely. And nobody, except for my dry cleaner, seems to miss the old gig. It's the new norm at our house and the dry cleaner will just have to get used to it.

One morning shortly after he was laid off, my husband had an early meeting with outplacement services. Instead of dressing in his new uniform of jeans and a t-shirt, he dressed in the uniform of not-so-long-ago: a pair of pressed brown slacks and a light blue button-down. I knew about his appointment, in fact, I put my stamp of approval on the outfit (another of my morning duties). But my daughter didn't know about my husband’s plan and as she got dressed and made her bed, she must have sensed that something was different.

I was in the hallway when she approached me. She had a worried look on her face and her enormous brown eyes were as big as I had ever seen them. They get that way when she sees or hears something that she shouldn't see or hear. She came very close, leaned up against me with her back towards my bedroom door where her father was putting the finishing touches on his outfit and whispered, "Um, Mom, why is Dad getting dressed for work?"

I glanced over at my husband and then back to my daughter and knew immediately what she was trying to say, "Dad is losing his mind and has forgotten that he is unemployed. Do something. Quick." She's seen this type of bizarre behavior in movies and read about it in books, and now she thought she was living it first hand.

To be honest, she might have expected this type of outlandish behavior from me, but certainly not from her father who has always been of sound mind and body. I realize that my first reaction should have been to reassure her that her father was not losing his mind, but instead, I collapsed into a fit of laughter at which time her eyes grew even larger. I quickly regained my composure and convinced her that he was not going crazy, he simply had an early morning meeting and was dressing the part. She let out a sigh of relief.

People keep asking me how our children are dealing with the fact that their father is unemployed. I am happy to report that they are doing just fine. It's not as if we've stopped feeding them 3 meals a day or moved them up to the attic so that we can take in borders.

Kidding aside, I realize that this is a tremendous change in our lives and a crisis like this can be very stressful. So far, my husband and I are keeping the stress to ourselves and not sharing it with the kids. I know that the experts would tell me that I can’t possibly hide stress from my kids; children are perceptive. And yes, we’ve had several frank and open discussions with the both of them.

They know that we are cutting back (read: no spring break trip, no week at the beach this summer) but it didn’t come as a shock because we taught them at an early age that money doesn’t grow on trees. They don’t need to know what’s happened to our 401(k). They do need to know that their father will be employed again. They know this and they know that there is no room for doom and gloom at our house.

Hopefully, those pressed khakis and button-down oxford shirts will be making their way out of the closet more and more often over the next couple of months. If that’s the case, we'll have yet another new norm to contend with at our house. I anxiously await that day, as does my dry cleaner.